The Essence of Perfection Read online

  She’d spent her adult life making things in a lab, but not something solid she could hold in her hands. Eventually, she stopped thinking about what to make and squeezed the clay. Surprisingly, she enjoyed the feel of the stiff cool material becoming soft and pliable in her hands. Slowly, Nicola’s mind cleared. Her fingers worked to turn the lump of clay into something. She wasn’t sure what exactly. If Fran asked what she was making, she could say she was letting the clay do the talking and Fran would believe her.

  “That’s interesting. What are you making?”

  The question, spoken in a smooth tenor voice with mild humor lacing through, sent a tremor across her skin. Her head snapped up and she spun around on her stool. Her foot made hard contact with the side of Damien’s knee. He swore and skipped back a step.

  “Oh no, I’m so sorry.” She reached out a hand to grab his knee, but he’d moved forward and her fingers brushed his crotch. Her face burst into flames. She snatched her hand back. Great, she was groping the man.

  He waved her off. “Not a problem,” he said massaging his knee. “I didn’t mean to startle you. I thought you heard me come in.”

  She glanced around. The rest of the class watched them. Embarrassment crawled across her entire body. “No, I was focused on this.” She pointed to the clay in front of her.

  “I noticed.” His thick brows were still pulled together with the remnants of the pain she’d caused, but he no longer rubbed his knee and eased toward her. “You seemed absorbed in your work. That’s why I came over to see what you were creating.”

  His clay, cedar wood, and bergamot scent teased her. His dreads were pulled up in a loose bun that should have looked silly. Smoky dark eyes, the tight, stain splattered t-shirt, and masculine ease combatted any thoughts of anything being remotely silly about this man.

  Damien slid into the space between her and Larry to get a better look at the lopsided creation in front of her. Her side tingled as if he’d touched her even though he hadn’t. She scooted away. She didn’t want to tingle because of him.

  “I’m just playing around,” she said, feeling foolish for not at least trying to make something recognizable.

  “The class is a joke to you?”

  Her eyes shot up to his. “No.”

  The corner of his mouth lifted. Humor brightened his eyes. “Calm down. I’m only teasing.”

  Heat spread through her face again. “Oh, I didn’t know you were capable of teasing.”

  “I’m capable of a lot of things.” He indicated with his head toward her clay. “What is it?”

  Her previous idea of saying she was listening to the clay seemed trite with him now. “I don’t know. I can’t figure out what to make.” She glanced around at the other people at her table. Mostly bowls and asymmetrical plates.

  “Is it you?”

  She shrugged. “More than likely. I always get in my head and it causes me to overthink.”

  “No, I mean is the person you’re making, you or someone else?” His finger ran across the edges of her work.

  Nicola frowned. “I’m not making a person.”

  “That’s what it looks like.”

  Nicola studied what she considered to be an elongated star-shaped lump and tried to see what he saw. She tilted her head to one side then the other. Now that he mentioned it, her work did kind of look like a really bad gingerbread figure.

  “I don’t know who it is,” she mumbled.

  “I think it’s you,” he continued. “A self-portrait.”

  Nicola didn’t bother to suppress her disbelieving snort. “I look like a gingerbread person?”

  He chuckled at her response. She liked his laugh. He gave her a once over. “I don’t know. You don’t have the stiff arms for a gingerbread figure.”

  Nicola laughed and shook her head. “Seriously, I wasn’t making a self-portrait or anything. I was just playing around. Wouldn’t that be kind of conceited. Making something in my own image the first lesson?”

  “Not at all. Doing a self-portrait is often the hardest thing to do. You have to really look inside of yourself in order to be authentic. If you’re choosing to really take a look at what’s inside of you then that can be scary. It takes a brave person to take that first step toward self-discovery.”

  Damn, she hadn’t expected him to get kind of deep on her. He studied her. No traces of sarcasm or joking in his features. Studied her as if he were trying to unlock her secrets.

  She shook her head and broke eye contact. No, a guy who got as many panties thrown as him as Idris Elba was not trying to unlock her boring secrets.

  “I’m not typically very brave,” Nicola said.

  “I’d bet you’re braver than you think you are. Don’t ever underestimate yourself.”

  Her gaze jumped up, but he was already turning away. “Mr. Goldberg, show me what you’re working on.”

  She frowned, then focused back on her own work. Her heart rate had jumped in speed with his simple encouraging words. Here she was about to read something into it. Wonder if he was possibly flirting. Not that she’d flirt back, but she could at least keep the thrill of having him flirt with her close through the upcoming weeks as she tried to figure out how to make Desiree’s perfume more exciting. Instead, he was just giving generic encouragement. Encouragement he more than likely gave to every other student who took a class at his studio.

  No need getting all excited. Damien Hawkins did not have time to flirt with or entertain the fantasies of the wide-eyed and thirsty women who inevitably joined his classes. She would focus on what she was here to do. Learn to open another creative outlet. Further her skills. Not fall for a guy like Damien.

  * * *

  Her grandfather called when she got home later that night. It was nearly nine and he didn’t typically call this late. Correction, he didn’t typically call out of the blue at all.

  She raised a brow and hurried to answer his call. “Hello?” She picked up the remote lying next to her on the couch and turned down the television.

  “Nicola, I found a show!” he announced in an excited tone.

  “A show?” She relaxed a little. He didn’t sound as if anything was wrong. Thank God. But the jubilation in his voice still made her wary.

  “A magic show!” He spoke the words in a hurry-up-and-catch-up voice. “I was down at the senior center the other day. I started going every once in a while, for the card games. Your grandmother said the people there were nice. Well, they wrangled me into taking her place on the board, so she should have said manipulative. Anyway, I saw they were having sign-ups for a talent show this spring. I figured, what the hell, and signed us up.”

  The congratulations on the tip of her tongue were stymied by his words. “Us? Wait a second, Grandpa, what do you mean us?”

  “You’re going to be my assistant, aren’t you?”

  Nicola sat up straight. “Since when did I become your assistant?” The pitch of her voice rose with each word.

  “Since you convinced me that your grandmother must have wanted me to keep doing magic. Every good magician has a lovely assistant. Why not my favorite grandbaby?” The grandfatherly guilt oozing through the phone was strong.

  “Don’t try to butter me up with flattery.” Nicola folded her knees up and wrapped an arm around them. Despite his obvious attempt to guilt her into participating, she smiled. She couldn’t remember her grandfather being this excited about anything.

  “I’m not trying to butter you up. I’m your grandfather and I can tell you what to do. Now come up next weekend and we can start practicing.”

  Nicola cringed. “I can’t come up next weekend. I’ve got plans.”

  “Make it work, Nicola. Remember, you’re doing things you normally wouldn’t do.” No more guilt, this time his words were edged with the don’t ignore my command she was used to.

  “Being in a talent show at the senior center is not on my list,” she countered.

  “Maybe, but spending more time with your family is. This i
s how I want you to spend time with me. Are you going to do it?”

  She was about to argue when an idea struck. One that would either get her out of this completely or have the potential to be good on film. “Only if you let me have cameras at the talent show.”

  “Deal!” he said faster than she expected. “It may be my ticket to stardom. Thanks, Nicola. See you this weekend.”

  With that he hung up, and Nicola was pretty sure she’d been played.

  Chapter 10

  “Well, how did the class with your crush go?” Shonda asked Nicola the next day as they had lunch at Maggiano’s.

  Nicola had spent the entire morning tweaking the formula on the samples she’d gone over with Desiree. To be sure, she hadn’t missed anything, she’d also gone to the original brief and started up a new mixture. Nicola planned to overnight some of the samples for Desiree to try while on tour. She didn’t want the process to slow down, or for Desiree to come back and hate everything with little time for Nicola to make adjustments.

  When Shonda called and asked her to lunch, she’d considered saying no. In the end, staying cooped up in her lab wasn’t going to make her find something brilliant any faster. She needed the break and, in an effort to do better, she took the break.

  “It wasn’t class with my crush.” Nicola pulled off a piece of the bread on her plate and dipped it into the olive oil mixed with cracked pepper. The smell of pepper, garlic, and yeast made her mouth water. She’d burned off the granola bar she’d grabbed from the stash LeShawn kept in the office and two cups of coffee she’d had for breakfast hours ago. “It was just a pottery class.”

  Shonda wiggled her perfectly arched brows. “Taught by the guy you’ve been Instagram stalking for almost a year.”

  “It’s not Instagram stalking I’m—”

  “Admiring his work. Yeah. I’ve heard you say that,” Shonda said in a no-nonsense tone of voice. “According to Quinn, you were all the way undressing him with your eyes at the art society luncheon the other day.”

  She considered tossing a piece of the bread at Shonda, but she was too hungry to waste it. “Will you two stop! Damien is a professional. I’m taking a class at his studio. Which is being taught by one of his apprentices, for your information.”

  Shonda’s shoulders hunched. “You mean he doesn’t come through at all.”

  “He did last night, but he won’t come through every class. He’s really busy and focused on his own projects. Which makes sense.”

  “You sound disappointed.”

  “A lot of the people in the class are disappointed.” Herself included. But after last night’s flirting that wasn’t flirting, she hoped he didn’t come through often. No need to give herself further opportunities to make a fool of herself.

  Shonda let out a huge sigh and sat back in her seat. “Quinn is going to be upset. You know she’s expecting you to sleep with Damien before the class ends.”

  Bread stuck in Nicola’s throat. Coughing, she picked up her water glass and took a long swallow. “You and my sister will be disappointed. Damien is not interested in me.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “I do. There are absolutely no sparks there.”

  Not on his part at least. No way was she telling her friend or sister about his lack of passion comment. Sure, he’d given her a compliment last night, but that was related to her lopsided creation. Nothing flirty or sexy about their interactions. For all she knew he had a girlfriend. He’d never posted anything like that, but his page was devoted to his art. He obviously liked to keep his personal life private. Which meant he could be married with five kids.

  The thought made the bread feel like a lump in her stomach.

  “Fine, I’ll let you live in that fantasy Miss I’m Blind to Flirting. Why don’t you tell me about what you’re going to do next on your list?”

  Another topic she’d prefer not to talk about. “I don’t know. Stacie is getting really anxious for me to pick something for them to record. So far I haven’t done anything really inspiring or exciting.” She hadn’t told Stacie about the magic show yet because she still hoped to convince her grandad to let her off the hook. Doubtful, but a woman could dream.

  Shonda sat up straight and her eyes brightened. “You can go with me and Quinn to Cancun.”

  “I thought you two were going this weekend?” She was disciplined enough to not sound salty about Shonda and Quinn’s plans to vacation without her. As much as she knew a trip to Cancun would make Stacie and the rest of the Your Morning Wake-Up Call team get excited, Nicola couldn’t be out of the office right now. Not with the Desiree project ongoing.

  Shonda’s head fell back and she groaned. “It didn’t work out,” she lowered her head and met Nicola’s eye. “My ex wants to be uncooperative and say he can’t watch the kids. I’d call BS, but I know this really is the busy time for him at work. We’ve decided to put it off for a month or so. Which means, now you can go.”

  She was about to say no. Already all the things she needed to get done on top of the project for Desiree popping in her head. They’d received briefs from half a dozen other potential clients who wanted them to make perfume. Not to mention the normal, year-round projects such as the seasonal soap scent she was working on. Tia could handle some of the work. Especially now that they had interns, but she couldn’t delegate everything to the other perfumers.

  Nicola could envision Tia and LeShawn’s eye roll if she gave that excuse in the office. Wasn’t the point of her agreeing to do the stuff on her list that she had to stop making excuses to avoid doing things she really wanted to do? To say to heck with the schedule and take some risks?

  “You know what. Let’s do it. Schedule the trip and I’ll go.”

  Shonda’s eyes narrowed. “For real?” Nicola met her eye and nodded. Shonda clapped her hands and shimmied in her seat. “Great! Quinn is going to be so excited. We are going to have such a great time.”

  The waitress came with their lunch. She placed their plates down and refilled their drinks before leaving. They took a moment of silence before digging in. She’d ordered lasagna, one of her favorite foods, and as expected, it was delicious. Her original plan was to order a salad, but that wasn’t what she wanted. She was living her best life and all of that.

  “I want to do everything you did on spring break in college,” Nicola said after swallowing a bite of food. “I missed it the last time and you had so much fun. I don’t want to miss out this time.”

  “Okay, but I’m too old to take a row of lemon drop shots.” Shonda pointed her fork at Nicola. “We’ll have to take that off the list.”

  Instead of agreeing, Nicola shook her head. “Nope, shots and everything. We’re going to have a great time.”

  “If that’s the case, why do you sound afraid?” Shonda asked, grinning.

  “Because this is crazy and I wish they never saw my list, but I’ve got to do something, so why not take shots in Cancun.”

  “Don’t worry,” Shonda said. “This really is a great idea. You need to get out and live the life you recreate in a lab. Stop focusing on capturing perfection in a bottle. Get out and smell the roses, spring rain, and mountain streams you imitate.”

  Nicola scrunched up her nose and shook her head. “I’ve never made a mountain stream. Streams don’t smell nice.”

  “You know what I mean. You’ll have fun while bringing attention to Queen Couture. This is a win-win.”

  Nicola nodded. “You’re right. This will be good.” She sighed. “But the Cancun trip is months away. Stacie wants something now.”

  Shonda gasped then gave Nicola a sly grin. “You know who I saw the other day?”

  The you’re never gonna guess slickness in her friend’s tone made Nicola nervous. Far be it from the universe to not throw Nicola another ridiculous surprise. “I don’t know, but I’m assuming you brought this up because you have a point.”

  “I saw Bobby Bradford the other day.”

  Nicola shook her hea
d. “No. Do not go there.”

  Bobby Bradford was the guy she’d been crazy in love with in college. The one who’d also gotten married a year after graduation. The guy she always regretted never going for because Quinn swore Bobby had been just as crazy about Nicola as she’d been about him.

  “Yes, I’m going there. I saw the list.”

  Her fork dropped to her plate with a loud clatter. “How did you see the list?” Her high-pitched shriek drew the attention of people sitting at the table near them.

  “It’s posted on the Wake Up Call website.”

  “What! No!” Nicola covered her face with her hands. Why would they do that? Had she agreed to that?

  “It’s okay, just a few things. Mostly the same stuff they mentioned on the show. And asking out Bobby Bradford was on the list.”

  “No, it’s not,” Nicola said. She was certain no names were involved related to the items on her regrets list.

  “Asking out a guy you like and not ignoring the signs is on the list. And we both know Bobby is the guy.”

  He was. She couldn’t ask Bobby out. “He’s married.”

  Shonda shook her head. “They split. I saw something he posted on Facebook about a year ago.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes, pretty sure.”

  So, Bobby was divorced. Maybe the woman he’d gotten with a year after college hadn’t been the one for him. Obviously, if they weren’t together anymore. What if this was her second chance? What if this was the universe saying go for it?

  “He’s back in Atlanta?” Nicola asked.

  “Yep, just moved back. Gave me his number and said to hit him up sometime. Right after asking about you.”

  He asked about her? The knowledge shouldn’t have made her feel like grinning or sent bubbles of eagerness through her belly. Why not call Bobby? He was the one who’d gotten away. She had no other prospects in her life. Nothing would happen with Damien. That had been just a silly admiration. Whereas Bobby was real, and probably put back in her circle by fate.